Why Do Seemingly Nice Teenagers Seem to Feel This Burning Need to Lie to Their Parents?

Published: 28th March 2013
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Why Do Teenagers Lie to Good Parents?

Parenting could be discouraging, specifically when all moms and dads pick for their kid or teen is happiness and success. Contrary to how it seems, it is very important to understand that your kid or teen does not awaken in the morning light and ask, "How can I upset my mom or dad today?" In fact, they want acceptance for who they are, and, for their parents, this can be challenging. In some way, we have assumptions of who we think our kids need to be, and as a teen specifically, they are exploring their independence and there are certainly things they do never wish you to hear about! Gosh, don't you remember what it felt like to be a teenager?

Young teens feel worry that if they do tell you the truth, you will be angry at them or not like them anymore. Is there a perk for your teen if they do tell you the fact? Or do you just desire the honest truth so you can be included and can regulate exactly what they do?

After a life time of the fear based punishment of threats, any kind of shouting, time-outs or spankings will trigger precisely that in your child, tween or teen, fear. Chewing out or engaging in a power combat with your young teen will trigger confusion since they do not even comprehend exactly what you are saying to them most of the time. I mean literally; they do not understand exactly what you are saying, they do not know the meaning of the words, and they do not understand how to ask you for assistance. So, in the end, your teen ends up feeling stupid and they clam up.

A great option to overcome this non-communication concern with your young teen, and that is all this is, a simple communication problem, is to accept them for who they are as an individual and start to utilize new language with them. First of all, never ever chastise your young teen or make them feel bad about exactly what they wear, exactly how they do their hair, and what they decide to do in their downtime.

Forget out-of-date punishment techniques that work, at best, for an extremely short time period. Start to lovingly direct their habits. You do this by asking good questions instead of dictating to them. Nobody appreciates being informed what to do ... even right here, I am simply suggesting that you do this. I am not telling you what to do! I am describing foryou what I have seen work.

Ask them good questions like "When you go out tonight, will you be back home at 10:30, 11:00 or by 12:00?" Or "What is it you like the best about hanging out with Timmy?" When you ask them point blank easy questions that are non-intrusive and non-judgmental, your teenager will open right up to you and just tell you the truth. When they are anticipated to do their duties and/or school work prior to when they go out, just question and quantify to make sure they comprehend precisely what you simply said.

You will ask, "Ben, I would love for you to go and have fun at your baseball game tonight. Exactly what is it you said you would do prior to you go out?" And your teenager will answer you, "I'm going to complete my laundry, put it all away, and sweep out the garage." When this is engaged in every day, every single day, you will create a gorgeous relationship and true friendship with your teen.

One full of respect.


Thomas Liotta brings over 15,000 hours of in-the-trenches training with 2,000+ children. He saw a 100% success rate with every child in self-control, responsibility and self-discipline. You can too. Get your FREE gift! The first 2 chapters of our new positive parenting book, A Simple Way to Guide Children and Teenagers to Happiness, Success and Gratitude.

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